You As A Poem - Part 2 (Cause You All Liked The First Part So Much)
Pile 1 - Paint
Breathless
Have I asked for too much?
I hit the ground so often
Trying to force open a door
Which was never meant for me
Love and Hate
Just one source
I might just know how to cut it right
I need to fall
To raise once again
The monsters in the wardrobe
The most lovely doll
It´s still waiting for me
Into the depth of my mind
Only my dreams
Offer ashore
For the forgotten waves
Death is close
I want to dance with it
The end is the beginning
I want to embrace it
Like I did with my scars
Scars always seemed to tell a story
A story I was interested in
Until I carried them on my own
Suddenly they felt heavy
Heavier then they looked on others
I thought they would make you strong
They do
But they are also a burden
And always will be
Now it´s time to raise
Not out of the ashes
But out of the water instead
Pile 2 - Umbrella
Girl In Green
I am not saying it´s love
It cannot be
It´s way too soon
I rarely felt this way before
Why am I so nervous?
Like she could hurt me
Even though she´s so far away
Just with her words alone
I spent all this time
Writing for her this text
For her birthday
I wish I could see her
And cook a meal with her
Does this sound odd?
And she said
It´s one of the most beautiful things
She´s ever gotten
Making me wondering
What if I put even more effort into this?
I feel so different compared
To all those crushes I had before
Like it´s something conflicting
Like it´s something so pure
What I want to drown in blood
It makes me remember
How it once was with her
A long time ago
Maybe I am truly not meant to be
With a man in this lifetime
I don´t even want to label it
I just want to see how it goes
As our conversation just flows
Like she said my poems do
Pile 3 - Leafs
Blank Blade
The unsung hero
Drowning in the chaos
They created themselves
All I can offer is a spark
Though it´s not enough
To light up the drenched ground
Oh, why is no one out there
Willing to offer me a torch
Or are they all afraid
My flames might devour them whole?
I never thought it would come this far
But I do not want to end
Like the knight in every single story
Dying for the greater good in war
Just like you expected me to do
I squeeze out every last drop
My mouth is so dry
I keep it inside
Locked behind safe walls
You made a mistake though
The pain taught me things
It didn´t just want me to die
No one ever expected me to end up here
Yet I am alive
Unlike you suspected
My blood is not red anymore
I know I write so much about this
Nothing ever changed
The color of my wings
It all has to return several times
Before I can find my peace with it
But this time
I won´t let you die
Born on Tuesday
Like the words have a second meaning
Let me guide the sword
Of the lords of hell
Pile 4 - Wall
Have I Lost My Mind?
I hate and hate and hate
All I ever desired
Melted in my hands
Through the fire of another
I guess I got what I asked for
To feel more emotions
To suffocate in the smoke
Now I don’t know anymore
If my state before was healthier
Or if this is the way
To truly heal those wounds
I fear I just keep ripping off
All those bandaids without a chance
Of feeling pleasure ever again
Spite is all I live for
Not by choice
But by need
I scream and whisper
Just to be run over again
You and me
It’s all I ever hoped for
Oh but here we are
The dagger ripped apart
Not only my heart
But also my life
And my whole personality along
Can I even be without you?
You were my family
The only one I ever had
You were part of me
The part I loved the most
Have I lost my mind?